Day 1: Stage 2 - Big Win. Because life is a work in progress

Starting again.  Every day we wake up and start again.  Today I decided to start my disciplined Ashtanga practice again.

It has been almost a month since I last wrote in this blog.  Thank the yoga-gods that isn't the last time I actually practiced.  In fact I have been practicing as much as I ever have. But sadly, my Ashtanga asana practice has been losing steam over the past month.  The focus required for a disciplined practice has been washed away and overrun by the basics of keeping a full life moving forward while living in Haiti.

It isn't that I don't have time.  It isn't that I don't have the energy.  It isn't even that I am not practicing and doing asana every day.  What is missing is focus and discipline.  Exactly what I need in my life overall and exactly what the Ashtanga practice has to offer. 

So here I am on Friday May 3rd, ready to re-engage and re-immerse myself into the will of my focused and disciplined practice.  I practiced this morning a full focused two hours and it was awesome.  Doing the sequence in order and on point created a powerful coming home feeling that is still sitting with me.

There were three 'wins' in the practice.  The coming home feeling has to be called a win, as it reminded me that this isn't something I 'should do' this is something I 'want' to do.

The second win was still being able to bind Marichyasana C, super glad that my haphazard practice over the month kept my hips and shoulders open enough to maintain where I left off.

The third big win was that I actually lifted both legs of the floor in dandasana. Something I have been trying numerous times in almost every practice as I work toward the strength I need for jump-throughs.  It was only a half a second, but I did it more than once.  That feeling of doing something that I have been trying to do day after day for weeks on end goes into the win column of life.

I know life isn't all about the wins - but damn I love to feel good about work I am doing on my yoga mat and in my life.  Day 1, Stage 2: Big Win. Because life is a work in progress...the tagline for Project Zen where I currently teach in Haiti.

Days 18-23: Finding Rhythms and making time to do the practice.

Back in Haiti. 100% here. Not so 100% with the practice.

It turns out it's just a little bit harder to commit to a daily practice when I am teaching a couple of classes a day and have other demands on my time. My grand plan had been to practice everyday after I teach a 6:30am-7:30am class.  Well that grand plan has been messed up by one thing or another almost every day.

Flexibility comes in handy. I am proud that I have practiced 4 out of the past 6 days, even if not at the planned time.  It's not too shabby for someone finding my rhythm living in a developing country.  I would really like to make that morning time work, and will keep trying.  And of course will keep finding my mat at other times if the mornings won't work.

All last week I continued my love affair with the Janu Sirsasana poses. I am getting so close to comfortable in all three versions.  It's cool to see how an (almost) daily practice can impact the pose experience so quickly.

When I was dabbling in Ashtanga over the past year, I couldn't imagine how anyone could ever sit on their heel or turn their foot at that angle and be OK.  But now just over 3 weeks of regular practice of the Primary Series postures and I am already seeing great improvements in how many of the poses feel.

This is not to say I have mastered the basic Primary Series postures.  Not at all. There are still a few postures that are fully beyond me: Bhujapidasana, Supta Kurmasana, Kukkutasana, Setu Bandhasana. Now that I wrote them down, I'm somewhat surprised that there are only 4 in the category of 'not doing that one right now'.

I love the practice and I love writing about it.  So tickled about the experience and watching it unfold.  Thanks for letting me share!

 

Days 15,16 & 17: In Transition, Costa Rica to Haiti

Day 15 was my last day in Costa Rica. I almost didn't practice. In the morning I took it easy, and had a big breakfast and was ready for a rest day.

Then I realized that I'd be traveling all the next day and so that would be my rest day.  And Flor, my new Costa Rican friend, also wanted to practice.  So we got on our mats together in the late morning and had a lovely practice.

We had practiced together on the first few days, but then our schedules weren't matching up. It was very sweet to have her by my side for my last practice in Costa Rica.

Day 16 was a rest day and the day I left Costa Rica.  The departure wasn't quite as sad as the days leading up to it.  The travel all went smooth and I felt happy to be returning to Haiti to teach more yoga and to continue to deepen my own practice.

Day 17. In Haiti. Struggling. I started to practice at the studio this morning and had to stop. I just didn't have the energy. Transition. Where is my yoga deck? Where is the ocean? Why am I here and not there?

I left the yoga studio mid-afternoon. I walked into my new house and bumbled around. Is this really home?

Finally at some point I realized the best place to answer all of these questions is on my yoga mat.  There is no answer, and that is what I remember when I get on my mat.

It is all about the experience of whatever is present. It is all about letting the questions and the unknown be what they are and being present with them in a way that lets them sort themselves out in their own time.

Transition.  I was there, and now I am here. On may mat in a different place doing the same postures, counting the same breaths and finding my sense of home. In me, wherever I am, even in transition.