Day 1: Stage 2 - Big Win. Because life is a work in progress

Starting again.  Every day we wake up and start again.  Today I decided to start my disciplined Ashtanga practice again.

It has been almost a month since I last wrote in this blog.  Thank the yoga-gods that isn't the last time I actually practiced.  In fact I have been practicing as much as I ever have. But sadly, my Ashtanga asana practice has been losing steam over the past month.  The focus required for a disciplined practice has been washed away and overrun by the basics of keeping a full life moving forward while living in Haiti.

It isn't that I don't have time.  It isn't that I don't have the energy.  It isn't even that I am not practicing and doing asana every day.  What is missing is focus and discipline.  Exactly what I need in my life overall and exactly what the Ashtanga practice has to offer. 

So here I am on Friday May 3rd, ready to re-engage and re-immerse myself into the will of my focused and disciplined practice.  I practiced this morning a full focused two hours and it was awesome.  Doing the sequence in order and on point created a powerful coming home feeling that is still sitting with me.

There were three 'wins' in the practice.  The coming home feeling has to be called a win, as it reminded me that this isn't something I 'should do' this is something I 'want' to do.

The second win was still being able to bind Marichyasana C, super glad that my haphazard practice over the month kept my hips and shoulders open enough to maintain where I left off.

The third big win was that I actually lifted both legs of the floor in dandasana. Something I have been trying numerous times in almost every practice as I work toward the strength I need for jump-throughs.  It was only a half a second, but I did it more than once.  That feeling of doing something that I have been trying to do day after day for weeks on end goes into the win column of life.

I know life isn't all about the wins - but damn I love to feel good about work I am doing on my yoga mat and in my life.  Day 1, Stage 2: Big Win. Because life is a work in progress...the tagline for Project Zen where I currently teach in Haiti.

Day 6 - Back when I could bind....yesterday

Today's practice started around 7:30am in a different location because the yoga deck was being used for a group class.  It took a little adjusting in the new location, but the practice went well.  There was less breeze so I sweated more, which actually felt cleansing and good.

The practice was zinging along, I was in it, I felt good and then came Marichyasana C. I bound it for the first time yesterday and was thrilled.

Today I twisted my left arm over my right knee, tucked my tummy past my thigh, pulled my knee as far into and up my arm moving toward the shoulder as much as I could, reached around and my arm just stopped.  It wouldn't wrap, then I slipped away from my leg and the twist lots it's depth. I hugged in again, twisted, reached and my arm stopped. The third time, I hugged my leg in, reached my arm down and out...nope.  Wtf?

I did it yesterday, but not today. I was pissed off for a moment, and then took a deep breath and remembered this is only Day 6, and I have a lifetime to get the bind. I felt it yesterday, and I am sure it'll be back. So I just reached for my ankle, and enjoyed a deep twist imagining the full posture.

I finished my practice with as much energy as I started, not letting the absence of a bind I found yesterday get in my way.  I am not doing this to get anywhere, I am doing this to feel what happens every day when I try the same postures again.

This Ashtanga practice is about the experience of doing it, not what I can do.  It's awesome when I feel the body do something it wasn't able to do it in the past. And it is just as awesome to notice that today it won't do something it would do yesterday.

See you tomorrow!